Javen Says:

For those who wondered whether m ok now... yes m feeling much better and somewhat disappointed with whatever that's going on in my life....
One thing for sure is that ignorance is really a total bliss in a sense... becoz knowing too much can jus ruin ur life... therefore knowing lesser is better... and the best is not knowing anything...

The onli way to do tat is to totally forget everything and jus slowly bow out of the picture...
I will bow out soon in time to come and i will change for the better...

WADEVA........... i dun wanna know anything...

Javen Says:

All is calm now, the storms over.. the heart has died and it feels like the time has come to a complete stillness...
My heart aches but i know time will heal... i won't know how long it will take.. but i pray for this to be over soon...
Life still moves on... stay happy always, i know it is to be the best for both of us to come to this decision... love you always... bye fairy...





This is song is specially for you... Ave Maria... though we are not together, it explains everything i feel for you....

She was lost in so many different ways
Out in the darkness with no guide
I know the cost of a losing hand
Never thought the grace of god go high

I found heaven on earth
You were my last, my first
And then here this voice inside
Ave maria

I've been alone
When i'm surrounded by friends
How could the silence be so loud
But i still go home knowing that i've got you
There's us when the lights go down

You are my heaven on earth
You are my hunger, my thirst
I always hear this voice inside
Singing ave maria

Sometimes love can come and pass you by
While your busy making plans
Suddenly hit you and then you realize
It's out of your hands, baby you got to understand

You are my heaven on earth
You are my last, my first
And then i hear this voice inside
Ave maria
Ave maria
Ave maria


Bye bye fairy... <3<3<3

Javen Says:
Another talent yet i discovered... so wonderful... too perfect a specimen...

Javen Says:

I hope u're reading this entry... put some effort pls...
disappointed as it is, i dun wanna hate u....
the least u could do is to try and make things seem less heartless... at least for me...

Javen Says:

I just realised that i have been such a fool for the longest time...

Javen Says:

Yest was prolly one of the days where i'm a lil happy aft some period...
The nite b4, i managed to hug my fav soft toy PUPU... hee call me a girl, but i realli miss it...
I went to watch the movie 17 again, which is realli meaningful... *winks*
Then i went to eat at one of our fav place Ayam Penyet at lucky plaza...
aft tat we sat train together and called it a day...
Yes! it's a simple outing, but still i am happy...
mayb the last time doing this, but i still pray for strength to move on...
pray for me...

Javen Says:


Yeah i know... emo emo emo... nothing but emo-ness... f*cking mood of mine is affecting me not only at home, but also at work... i have not been performing which i should be because it's my probation period...

I have not been eating well... onli a meal a day... i have not been smiling, i have not been talking much and i have not been cheerful for quite a while...

I'd rather die than to go thru this suffering... i'm beginning to wonder where are all the pple who love me? m doubting love aft what i have gone thru, m feeling totally helpless and m so disappointed w myself... but then again, no pain no gain, no failure no success....

I'm like a lil puppy helpless being kicked away, but it still runs back to the owner whining, begging with no dignity.. what has become of me?
A lil puppy dunno anything, but i know better coz i'm human... yet i gotta stoop so low jus to beg and get coldness...

Shameless? I wan to wake up from this nightmare soon and move on w my life...
Under appreciated...

You're not to be blamed, i am guilty too, but that does not make you innocent...

i dun believe in love anymore and i dun believe in fairytale endings...

i can go on and on and on... but i choose not to pity myself or look pathetic in others eyes, esp yours... i have lose my dignity and i'm gonna get it back...

thanks for reading, thanks for sharing and thanks for loving me once...